I just kept waiting on yesterday to have some sort of closure, or to have turned out to have been one really big prank… turns out it was: one really big prank that the universe was playing on me.
If anyone of you follow me on Facebook you know that my status was: Amy Skeens and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. It really was a fitting title for my day, and I had been thinking about the book not too long ago.
I then followed it up with: Dear Universe, I concede.
I really was feeling sorry for myself. I had a very long week, and had decided to wallow in self-pity. There were several factors that have been bothering me lately:
1. I tend to bite off more than I can chew.
2. I have been outrageously busy with school and work.
3. I’ve been dealing with some health issues, and have been feeling sooo tired lately.
4. I met with an old friend earlier this week. We’ve had our differences, disagreements, and have drifted apart. We both agreed to sit down and talk about things.
5. My Friday: I had a commitment to help with a student talent show at work and needed to go directly from a staff meeting to pick up a helium tank — then straight to the decorating. I was slated to decorate from noon until the talent show, attend the show, and then clean up after. On the way to get the helium tank:
6. I wrecked my car. (I’m fine, and so is the car.) Basically: I was stressing about my life, and made a wrong turn onto a street that I wasn’t trying to go down. It was completely residential, so I didn’t want to try to turn around in anyone’s driveway. I drove about a mile to a fork in the road. The left way led straight up a hill to a photography studio, and the right led down to some homes (and was marked with a Private Drive sign). The roads led parallel for about 50ft, just that one went up, and one went down. I started up the hill, and planned to backup while turning right into the lower part of the split in the road.
I started cutting too soon, and realized that I was going to go over the hill instead of hitting the other road. (I needed to go straight backwards about three more feet before cutting than I did.) I realized what I was doing, and put my car back in drive. My back tires were on the edge of the pavement and where it turned to the shoulder of the road. When I tried to put it in drive to pull up the shoulder and hillside collapsed. The back of my car sunk some, and my driver’s side front tire couldn’t get traction. I tried to press the gas one more time, and it just made more ground give. The whole back end of my car was now over the newly created ledge, I heard the bottom of the car hit the pavement, and knew I was stuck. My car was sort of teeter-tottering with the frame touching what was left of the road part, and no wheels touching. I wasn’t scared of the fall since it was only about 3 or 4 feet down until it would hit the other road, but I was scared that if the back fell first that the car would flip over. (I couldn’t stop thinking of the jeep scene from Jurassic Park! … only me) I slowly took my seatbelt off, grabbed my wallet and phone, and jumped out.
While standing outside waiting on the tow-truck it started snowing like crazy, and anything that could keep me warm was in the car. As I stood there in the snow, I thought:
I didn’t lose it. I calmly stood there, and waited for help. (I was equally as calm when I called AAA to come hitch my car out.) I couldn’t get upset or cry. I was afraid if I lost it and broke down that I would never get my composure. I just knew that I would cry forever… so I didn’t. Once they got my car out (and told me it was safe to drive), I drove to get the tank, went to work on the decorations, and stayed at the show.
The funny thing is: I had a blast.
1. I am always going to bite off more than I can chew, because I like a challenge. I like pushing myself, and I wouldn’t know what to do with it if I had free time anyway!
2. School does keep me busy, but I better just get acquainted to that! Even when I wrap up this program in May – I’ve already enrolled in another! School isn’t something that is about to change for me. I am grateful for that even if I don’t always remember that I am. I have a wonderful situation by working at an institution that is willing to waive some tuition costs in order for me to continue to better myself. That is an opportunity that I can not pass up, and I will try to remind myself of that more.
3. Whatever is going to happen will. I just have to have faith, and trust that I’m going to be fine. It also can’t hurt me to continue to do all of the ‘extra healthy’ things that I have been!
4. Yes, meeting with an old friend can be stressful! It was stressful, but it went so well. We talked things out, both took responsibility for a lot, and decided to keep in touch. Nothing at all unrealistic. We both agreed that acting like nothing ever happened, or assuming we could go back to the way things were was not an option. Just talking brought me so much closure, and I let go of a lot of negativity.
5. The Talent Show was a huge success! I realized how much I like the people that I work with, the students that run the organization, and how grateful that I am for my job. There were so many students there that had some really awesome talents. The worst part was that I didn’t get home in time, and Daisy pee’d on the bathroom rug. Hey, I can throw that in the washer! The more I thought about it, the more I felt like an idiot for feeling sorry for myself. I am so blessed on a daily basis, and I was almost ashamed for even taking the time to focus on only the negativity for so long. On the way home from the talent show I was able to see the The High Street Jazz Band for the first time! I can’t believe I had never heard of these guys! They’re wonderful performers that put on shows by starting their own marching parades!
Check them out:
6.) Yes, I let my car fall over a hill. It wasn’t like it was a real accident, or was particularly scary. I was completely fine (other than frozen). The car is fine: a few scratches, but those were mostly from the tow-truck pulling it back up over the hill. I got home right about the same time as Kevin. I had messaged him about the day that I was having. I didn’t want to tell him about the car, but was scared that AAA would call him back instead of me –our account is together–. That wouldn’t have been the best way for him to find out! He brought me back Tangled, Waiting for Superman, and the new Britney Spears cd! Heck, I was just excited to see him!